Cuckolding

Cuck.

Traditionally, the word stems from ‘cuckold’, which describes a married man with an adulterous wife. 

‘Cuckold’ comes from ‘cuckoo’, a bird that lays its eggs in the nests of other birds like crows. The crows unknowingly raise and feed the cuckoo’s offspring, despite having no biological connection to them. 

On several internet spaces, it is an all out insult to call someone a cuck. The insult implies you’re submissive, you welcome and deserve humiliation and often, it’s used against men who have progressive views on s*x, intimacy and women’s pleasure. 

But in a fetish context, a cuckold is a man who derives pleasure from his partner having sex with other people. 

Most modern-day cuckolds are willing participants in their partner’s non-monogamy. They may organize dates for their partner or watch them have sex with other people. Cuckolds may have any sexual identity. The partners of cuckolds and the people they have sex with may be of any gender or sexuality. The term cuckold is the masculine equivalent of cuckquean. Another related term, cuckcake, refers to the woman that the husband is consensually having sex with.

Cucking is so deeply rooted in so many different cultural practices, it now operates as a well recognised kink within its own right and even pops up as its own genre of porn.

Why are people into cuckolding?

For some it’s the thrill of an affair without actually cheating on each other. It’s the adrenaline of inviting someone new into your bedroom while your partner can only watch.

Or the excitement and arousal of your partner and someone else having sex and sending you dirty texts, voice notes, images and videos of it. It’s the fear of your partner having a great time with someone else, followed quickly by the urge to have intensely intimate sex to show your partner how hard you want to keep them sexually satisfied.

On the surface this may sound like toxic tactics to make your partner miss you more or guilt them into being more sexually experimental or intimate with you. But just as any other facet of kinks and BDSM, this act and dynamic is also explored with continuous and nuanced consent. The adrenaline, the anxiety, the humiliation and dirty talking are carefully built and expanded with care, intimacy and affection. Not mind games to manipulate the partner or relationship.

But everyone who has cuckolding fantasies will not be experiencing it the exact same way. Depending on the nuances of what turns you on, you may be more of a 'hotwife' fetishist than a cuckold. 

'Hotwife' as in “I have a really hot wife, wouldn’t you like a chance to please her?”.

While cuckolding relies on the idea that men 'own' women and are therefore humiliated if their wife sleeps with someone else, 'hotwife' fetishists are more into the idea that your wife having successful and joyous sexual encounters with others is a matter of pride.

Like when your partner wins at a sport or gets promoted at work. It’s a shared victory!

Cuckolding isn’t the same as swinging or SRSP. Cuckolding’s core is Humiliation & Degradation which sets it apart from Hotwifing. Cuckold fantasies may feel more emotionally intense than threesomes or swinging and people may avoid that dynamic altogether, especially if humiliation does not add to their arousal or intimacy.

A cuck-hotwife couple may have a steady third partner for their cuckold dynamic, or may explore new partners each time. Regardless of who the third is, the basic setup remains the same– the cuck is someone who wants, craves and LOVES watching his partner feel pleasure and arousal with others while also having the need to be teased, have an aspect of humiliation, he loves the way his heart races when his partner is with someone else and he enjoys the frustration of not being able to partake in anything until the scene is over.

A cuck isn’t just someone or anyone you can mock on the internet. It’s someone who knows exactly what turns them on and exactly how to explore it with their partner in ways that can bring pleasure, fun, intimacy, care and some mutually consensual dirty talk and playful degradation.

Sounds like a pretty secure and caring person to me.

Labels and Definitions in this dynamic include:

Cuckold: The (typically male/masc) person whose partner has sex with others in front of them or in other locations without their presence

Cuckquean: The (typically female/femme) person whose partner has sex with others in front of them or in other locations without their presence

Cuckoldress: The Cuck’s partner who teases and humiliates him with other sexual partners

Bull: The person invited to have sex with the cuckoldress and degrade or tease the cuck

Cuckcake: The person invited to have sex with one partner to tease and degrade the cuckquean

Hotwife: A femme person who has sex with others while their partner finds joy, arousal and excitement from the hotwife’s encounters with others